You couldn’t make this crazy stuff up…

Never a dull moment in the life of our favorite 22 year old Lesbian Actress Lindsay Lohan says is said to be “terrified” her 48-year-old father will harm her. She says dad “Michael Lohan” should be “On Drugs” to stop him publicly shaming her (and acting like a complete bozo).

Lindsay and "Daddy Dearest" Michael Lohan!

A source close to the Lesbo star said: “Lindsay is going to take out a Restraining Order against Michael. He is behaving so erratically that she’s terrified he’ll do something to her. She’s contacted her lawyer to arrange this.”

It’s really no big suprise as Lohans parents are slightly whacked anyway. Michael – who has three children, Lindsay, Ali and Cody, with ex-wife Dina Lohan (Who is a Total Nut Job) – has also driven away the rest of his family with his behavior and attitude.

Sources said: “Ali already has an order of protection against him, as does Dina. No one is speaking with him until he gets help.”

Lindsay wrote on her MySpace page: “My father obviously needs to be on medication to control his moods. He is out of line and his words show how much anger he has, and it’s dangerous and scary as it reminds me of how he treated my mother and I my whole childhood. He needs to be stopped. This is yet another reason why we aren’t speaking.”

Lohans Lesbian partner Samantha Ronson, who looks like she (He?) has a lot of experience being On Drugs,  has offered to hook him up with some Good Shit!

Michael Lohan (Dad) Is Pissed!

It appears our favorite Lesbian Actress Lindsay Lohan, has fallen off the wagon and is back on the Booze again. This report comes from her dad Michael Lohan.

Fresh Out Of Rehab – Lindsay Lohan Drunk Again!

“I’ve been up and down the road (in discussions) with my ex-wife (Dina) and it’s to the point now that I’m going to confront Samantha and Jenny Muro (Lindsay’s production assistant) myself” says Michael.

It’s All Sam’s Fault!

Then Michael Lohan went on to say, “Samantha drinks and passes the drinks under the table to Lindsay, and behind the scenes it gets worse and worse,” says Lohan. “Sam is using my daughter. My daughter isn’t working because she’s always with Sam. Even my ex-wife knows it. She just isn’t doing anything about it.”

It’s rumored that Lohan was seen snorting Cocaine in the bathroom of a local club, although we could not confirm or deny this report!

Lindsay Lohan’s mother has denied rumors of her daughters Overdose On Crack and Booze. (Following in Mommy’s Footsteps?)

Dina Lohan told People Magazine that she [Lindsay] went to the hospital on Thursday night because she was having an asthma attack. “She was losing oxygen. She couldn’t breathe” “It’s really sad” – Yeah Right (sounds like a Crack Attack)!

Seeming to have now accepted her daughters Lesbian Relationship, Dina says “Lindsay’s lucky to have Ronson by her side”, “Samantha is an angel.”